When your partner and your family/friends don’t get along : suggestions on how to handle this….
So, you’ve finally met someone you click with. The conversations flow, the values match, and you both feel ready to take the next step, introducing them to your nearest and dearest.
But then…it does not turn out as it should.
Either your family/friends don’t take to them the way you hoped, or your prospect just doesn’t enjoy being around someone you really care about.
Now you’re stuck in the middle given the two important parts of your life aren’t blending well.
Here are suggestions on how to deal without losing your peace of mind:
1. Accept it might not change.
Not everyone has to get along. Sometimes, the best you can hope for is mutual respect when they cross paths.
2. Listen before reacting.
Ask your partner and your friends/family what’s bothering them. Hear them out, share your side, and then give them space to figure it out but don’t try to force instant harmony.
3. Let both sides know where you stand.
Tell them they’re both important to you. It’s not about choosing sides, it’s about keeping both relationships intact.
4. Set a ‘civility rule’.
Even if there’s no chemistry between them, let them know you expect basic courtesy when they meet. This isn’t about being best friends, it’s about being respectful.
5. Be okay with solo time.
If your prospect and, say, your sibling just can’t see eye to eye, it’s fine to spend time with your sibling without your partner. That’s not disloyalty, it’s keeping important bonds alive.
6. Protect your relationship.
At the end of the day, it’s about you and your prospect who will become your partner. As long as you both respect each other’s priorities and support each other, the rest can be managed.
Finding someone compatible does take effort. But meeting your person shouldn’t mean giving up the relationships that existed before them.
End of the day the onus will be on both of you to create a healthy balance between each other and your respective social circle, with the hope that your prospect and you are emotionally mature who value what you both share.
You may wish to share this piece with your prospect if both of are you looking to enter into a relationship and/ or opt for a session on relationship guidance.
