This is what I look for in my partner #GenderEquality

andwemet
andwemet

andwemet

May 29, 2021

Is it wrong if as a woman I want my partner to be liberal and will like him to have? I understand we as Indians live in a patriarchal society and this does not make it easy for man also to change this process. Changing the mindset and going towards gender equality is not a simple task and will take time. But this does not mean that we cannot be the change and should start with small steps. But sometimes I feel disappointed when I see the reality is far different from what I read. I am a single urban Indian woman who is out there looking for a life partner and have met several, most unfortunately, they don't even want to know about gender equality and about ‘feminism’. They have the mindset that this is ‘fake feminism’ going on or Indian women are getting affected by western culture. Also, there is a strong perception that if the woman is a feminist, where she asks for gender equality then definitely, she is not ‘Sanskari’ and lacks values.

Today’s when everyone is looking for a compatible partner, finding a partner with a similar mindset and compatibility is becoming more difficult than earlier times despite having access to meeting single people. There are a lot of dating websites, marriage matrimony websites but still, it’s not that easy. Why? Maybe those looking for a long-term relationship seek fewer compromises and more happiness.

As a young Indian woman, I am looking for a partner who is more sensitive to these topics. Who can at least try to understand these new changes and try to accept them?

So, here is the list of things that I feel most women want in their partners.

Respect her career choices - especially in a middle-class family, a woman's career is not that important. This means whatever she achieves, it will not give her the power to make her own decisions. So, I want my partner to respect my career as I do his.

Liberal thinking- Liberal thinking what I mean is that there is one thing I despise when a man or his family decides how his partner or wife dresses or if she can have a job or not. He or his family need to ‘allow’ the woman to do things ‘her way’. This ‘allow’ nature should not be there if you are partners.

BTW, I am yet to hear from a woman that she allows her husband to do a job.

Women want their partner to be their support system. I firmly believe that if the women get this needed support, they can then achieve anything.

Feminist- This is controversial because everyone has their definition of feminism but how most women define is accepting gender equality. For example, A mindset that house-hold chores are a woman’s responsibility even if she is working is changing. Looking after your own home are life skills which should be in both men and women. Another example is questioning women because they smoke or consume alcohol should stop - because neither smoking & drinking is good for a man’s health as well. Feminism in my terms is when women have the same power as men in making and taking decisions of their own life.

I am sure there are other things which a woman is looking for in their partners, but I think these are basic and should be in all men.

I understand that like women, men also have their list of choices when they are looking for a partner to build and will like. I think they also want to build a healthy relationship.

Now let’s talk about what I will bring to this relationship

I will bring respect to the relationship and support him and his decisions. I will respect his career choices, his decisions, and his opinions because I think that it's not possible that two people always have the similar opinion, and this should be acceptable. I also feel privacy is important and it should be there even after you come into relationships. I will also respect his private space if he asks for it.


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