Why is it so difficult for someone divorced to find their person?

Why is it so difficult for someone divorced to find their person?

This question has lingered in my mind since childhood, when I overheard living room conversations among my parents' friends and family. Whenever someone was going through a divorce, the response was often grim and filled with sadness.

Breakups are undeniably heartbreaking, but what stood out was the undertone of pity—expressions like “their life is over” or “who will marry a divorcée?” were all too common.

Over time, I came to understand that divorce happens for many reasons, such as:

👎Abuse in the relationship

👎Incompatibility—whether emotional, sexual, or financial

👎Excessive interference from family and friends

If you were married and faced any of the above, wouldn’t you want to leave that stifling, claustrophobic situation?

Or should you stay, just because you’re married?

Finding your person is undoubtedly a personal choice. However, through conversations with members of the andwemet community, I’ve noticed an interesting pattern—many say they are hesitant to meet someone divorced because they believe they “come with issues.” Yet, they are perfectly fine meeting someone who was in a long-term relationship that didn’t work out.

This contradiction has me wondering—why does a legal tag like ‘divorce’ carry so much weight, while an unsuccessful long-term relationship doesn't?

And should either matter in the first place?

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