How to Avoid Being Duped on a Dating Site
(And Why Awareness Matters More Than Algorithms)
Every so often, we come across stories of people being swindled on dating platforms. It’s heartbreaking — and a sharp reminder of how vulnerable we can be when we’re seeking connection.
That said, it’s important to remember: a dating platform — no matter how thoughtfully designed — cannot take responsibility for the personal choices individuals make.
At andwemet, a community built for singles aged 28 and above, we often encourage members not to invest emotionally unless both people have expressed a clear intent to move forward as individuals.
All our members are adults — responsible for their own decisions and behaviours. Yet, when I hear about someone getting emotionally or financially hurt, I find myself asking:
What makes us trust a stranger so quickly?
Why do we rush to share money or deeply personal stories with someone we’ve barely met?
There’s another pattern that often shows up: the desire to “save” someone. A prospect shares a sob story, and we instantly feel the urge to be their anchor. It’s a beautiful impulse — rooted in empathy — but sadly, it can be a major red flag. Manipulators often exploit that instinct.
At andwemet, we offer optional background checks for members who want that added sense of security. But even with tech, there’s a reality we can’t ignore:
No screening tool can guarantee someone’s personality.
That part only unfolds with time, honest interaction, and emotional clarity.
And here’s the bigger issue — one we rarely speak about openly:
We don’t talk about how to date.
We don’t teach it. We assume it comes naturally.
But when you're dating with the intent to find a long-term partner, how you date matters — immensely.
That’s why andwemet offers relationship guidance, not just for our members but also for any single navigating the dating world and seeking clarity.
If you’re dating online — here’s a guide to keep close.
✅ How to Avoid Being Duped on a Dating Site
1. Don’t Rush the Trust
Chemistry is exciting — but trust should be earned, not assumed. Let it build slowly.
2. Be Cautious with Personal Details
Never share financial info, home addresses, or passwords early on — no matter how charming they seem.
3. Spot the Red Flags
They avoid video calls or in-person meetings
They rush to say “I love you”
They share sob stories and ask for money or favours
Their stories don’t add up
4. Don’t Be the Saviour
If you find yourself trying to rescue someone early on, take a pause. That urge may be based on manipulation, not reality.
5. Verify, Don’t Assume
A well-written profile and good photos aren’t proof of anything. Use video chats, check public profiles, and if you need help, use verification tools like those offered on andwemet.
6. Go Slow, Stay Present
Pace your emotional investment. The right match will respect your pace — not push past it.
7. Talk to Someone You Trust
Unsure? Share your experience with a friend, sibling, or relationship guide. A neutral perspective can offer invaluable clarity.
8. Report Suspicious Behaviour
Whether you're on andwemet or another platform, report anything that feels off. It protects you and others.
Final Thought
Dating can be beautiful — but only when paired with awareness.
This blog may make a good read - Creating your must-have/ non-negotiables
